Divorced, But Not Forsaken

Well, not divorce ‘-d’, yet, but divorce is in the talks for me and my husband.

Don’t get freaked out or be overly sad for me.

This isn’t a dramatic, overly sad thing for us. There is a sad feeling around it, it’s a little heavy, but it’s not being talked about as a matter of pain and hurt being caused to each other or as a matter of inability to peacefully co-exist.

Through the last four years of non-monogamy, my husband and I have discovered a depth of incompatible, individual authenticity.

I am very non-monogamous. My sexual temperament and relational nature are most realized in non-monogamy.

Our only previous “problem” was the sexual incompatibility between us due to his ED and my sexual needs. Now that I’ve been able to keep all the rest, which is healthy, beautiful, and works between us, and also find fulfillment sexually with others, looking at us apart from my current situation with the boyfriend, I’d be excessively content to stay married to him and be non-monogamous. Though, I can’t go back to monogamy with him as, while monogamous, I had to bury a significant part of myself that I don’t want to bury again.

He, however, has discovered that he is very monogamous. His sexual temperament is not wired for casual sex and his relational nature really desires the…