September Writing Challenge — Day 16: Myself Again

I’m challenging myself to a daily writing prompt through September. Instead of finding a pre-prepared list, this year, I’m going with a Writing Prompt Generator. The prompt for the day will be added to the story in quote format.

“Her laughter sounded like chime bells ringing in harmony.”

I have a rather boisterous laugh. I’m pretty sure no one would describe it as ‘chime bells’. But never mind that, the point is, last night, I laughed … a lot. And it felt really good.

I went on a date to meet with a newer connection who has been green pastures for me. We’ve shared a really lovely, intellectually stimulating chat connection for a few weeks now. I haven’t had to be ‘as wise as a serpent’ with him because he’s incredibly self-aware and has willing been transparently communicating his truths. He’s not been a wolf. He’s not making me figure out who he is and what’s moving him through the world and, my GOD, have I needed that in my experience.

For months now, at best, I’ve been surround by wolves who aren’t self-aware enough to conscientiously know what’s moving them, at worst, wolves who do know and don’t give a shit who they stomp on to get what they want. And, because of that, I’ve been in constant situations of doubt forcing me to have to give either the benefit or, at the least, hold the wolf at arm's length and sometimes, smack the wolf out of my life.

I haven’t had to give him the benefit of the doubt because he’s not yet created a reason for me to doubt who he is and why he’s moving the way he does. And if nothing more comes from having met him, at the very least he’s restored that part of my soul that yearns to know that there are other authentic, transparent, whole and healthy people in the world.

It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being able to own that you’re not and because you’ve accepted and embraced your whole person, your whole truth, you’re comfortable enough with yourself to say, “This is me.” You know, understand, have accepted, and love yourself so it’s OK when other people don’t. You don’t do or say things to gain approval or acceptance and you don’t hide things for fear of rejection or to control an outcome.

And because you know the peace that brings you, it’s natural to accept and embrace other people for who they are when they say, “This is me.”

We shared an, often humorous, evening of “Hey, this is me”, “Hi you, this is me”. We gave each other the opportunity to accept and embrace the other, and we did — figuratively and literally.

He had another thing to attend mid-evening so, we said our good-byes and I headed to my home-away-from-home for Karaoke night. I bounced in, sat with friendly acquaintances, supported a friend who’d had a rough night, gave out friendly hugs, flirted, danced, sang, smiled, and laughed.

I was myself last night and it felt really, really good to be back.