And quite possibly a lot of other stressors in your nonmonogamy
I’ve been fairly, ‘Stab a Bitch’ lately. My internal space goes from zero to stab-y pretty quickly right now. I’m not sure why at the moment, but it’s probably smart that I don’t spend too much time in the Facebook Poly group I’m a part of because there are a lot of basic ‘bitches’ there and I’m relatively certain that ruthlessly stabbing people with my words would be frowned upon.
A post ran across my home feed that asked us to use our best poly lingo to describe what a ‘situationship’ is.
I foolishly looked through the comment section before composing one of my own. *Groan.
And I always groan there because 99.99% of the time the negative, critical, miserable, judge-y comments in response to just about anything in that group boil down to one thing: Most people, including nonmonogamous/poly folks, don’t give any thought at all to discovering what’s down below their feelings and conditioning to understand what it is that they’re actually looking for when they feel attracted to someone and start moving closer to them.
Reading through the comments, I’m thinking, “That actually reflects your secure attachment needs rather than correctly defining the word.”
So, let me define ‘situationship’!
A situationship is when two people share a romantic/sexual bond that fits into the ‘situations’ of their independent lives. They enjoy each other’s company enough to do couple-y things together but aren’t building a secure attachment relationship or hopping on the ‘relationship escalator’.
That’s it. Companionship. It’s not a hard concept to grasp and there’s nothing wrong with or bad about it when both people involved understand that’s what they’re doing and have consented to it.
“Emotionally unavailable”, “Unwilling to commit”, “Shady” … and on and on, #eyeroll. ^^Your secure attachment needs are showing, ya’ might want to tuck them in a bit.
Venus stationed direct in Libra over the weekend and all sorts of other astrological stuff that should have us all moving forward in love, relationships, beauty, and art in some way.